Overthinking: The Bane of My Existence

Having the mind of an overthinker truly feels like the bane of my existence. Imagine going through every single day analyzing—no, overanalyzing—every interaction you have. I can’t just take conversations at face value. My brain automatically dissects every sentence, every pause, every expression, and turns it into a narrative. I can be looking someone straight in the eye, and the slightest shift in tone or mood sends me spiraling.

Did I say something wrong? Did I offend them? Was that the wrong question? Am I being too much? Too pushy? Too annoying?

It’s a horrible feeling, and it genuinely hurts to live this way day after day. But it’s not something I can simply switch off. I’ve always been like this, and I don’t think I know how to exist any other way. There are times when I replay interactions endlessly in my head, trying to figure out if I did something off-putting—or if someone is suddenly wary of me because they haven’t replied to a text for three hours.

Logically, I know they probably have a hundred things to do. I know that in my soul. Yet my brain never fails to drag me into the abyss anyway.

It sucks to constantly need reassurance that I’m liked, that I’m not being ignored—not because I expect it, but because my thoughts run wild in the silence. I end up wandering through this maze of overthinking until something distracts me or the person acts “normal” again. It’s like a switch in my brain: once it flips on, everything suddenly has a double meaning. The tone of someone’s reply becomes a clue that must be analyzed, broken down, studied. And then—just as suddenly—the switch flips off the moment they sound like themselves again.

It’s exhausting even trying to explain this. The switch metaphor is the best I could come up with after thirty minutes of thinking. I know I can’t fix it—not completely. This switch is mine to deal with, and most days I manage.

But there are days when I wish I could smash that switch with a sledgehammer and finally stop feeling this way.

For now, though, the switch remains. And I just try my absolute hardest not to let it get the better of me.