I think it is an amazing point that majority of humans on this planet have a unifying experience that brings them together, and that is high school. There’s something about high-school that brings out the worst in people. When you’re going through grades 9-12 it feels like you’re alone with the struggle, but there are so many people around the world going through the exact same thing.

It is not a topic I talk about much but the people close to me know how much those four years impacted me. I was filled with self-doubt, self-hate, insecurities and was made to feel inferior to people. So much so, that, even now, remnants of those experiences remain in my memory.

Most of you might be thinking that I should get over it. But if only it was that easy. The simple fact is that it was a horrible and traumatic experience and one that will probably take a few more years to ‘get over.’ Of course, the blame does not only fall on those individuals that made sure I felt I was beneath, some of it also does fall on me.

I was definitely a weird kid that did not know his place. I’d try to integrate myself where I probably did not belong. This in turn led to me being left out and shunned. Memories of these instances and ingrained deep within me and it holds onto me like a vice, I cringe even now thinking about it.

I have only a handful of people from those days whom I regularly keep in contact with. It’s not because time passed us by, but because I chose to move 7000 miles away for a fresh start and completely cut them from my life. Even now, my social media feeds only contain people I met from the fall of 2017 and onwards, except for the handful I mentioned.

This story does have a happy ending though. Because I am nothing like I was back then. I am proud to say I have done a complete 180 and become en entirely different person. If you compare the me of today, and the me of early 2017 they are two different people. I have confidence in myself, a feeling that was a stranger to me. I am unrecognizable from the shell of the person I was in high school.

For this, I credit the people I surrounded myself with. Without their help, I probably would gone down a completely different path. I am grateful, always. The people who did me wrong back then, unfortunately you still live in my mind rent-free. However this is just temporary housing, soon I will have the mental fortified to evict you permanently and not give you an ounce of thought more.

The best of me is yet to come.

~I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it~